


Do You Blame Yourself

by enbyglowstick



Category: The Umbrella Academy (TV)
Genre: Gen, Vanya Hargreeves Needs A Hug
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-06
Updated: 2021-02-06
Packaged: 2021-03-18 20:48:02
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 421
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29249778
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/enbyglowstick/pseuds/enbyglowstick
Summary: Every time Vanya closed her eyes, she was taken back to the darkness
Kudos: 13





	Do You Blame Yourself

**Author's Note:**

> I don’t know why I did this nor what this is but I did it so it is here

Missing everything she had lost and stuck in another universe she was unwanted in, Vanya closed her eyes for a moment of peace. This was not the case as the second the world went dark, her mind was back in the body of someone who wanted revenge on a world that had been infected with darkness. In the body of someone who wanted to be the light that would push the darkness away. Enclosed by a light that trapped her in darkness, left alone with her screams.

The end of something was the end of the darkness. A world forever full of the flames of the moon and forever free of the pollution of humanity. However, the cycle would always repeat and there would always be a meteor to let the world start anew. Light contained does not last forever, the same way a bulb blows and the same way the gun went off.

Every time her eyelids shut, she was back in that place of darkness, longing for light to let her out. Whether that darkness is betrayal, loneliness or pain, she was forever trapped with it by the light of the world and when that light goes, darkness pollutes her mind. 

When the light is no more, the darkness is all what is left, similar to when the darkness overwhelms her and her mind is split in two. One is the light fighting for darkness to be extinct and the other is the soul drained of its colour. Therefore, each time light disappears from her vision, she is brought back to the times when she was only darkness.

That night at the motel room, the lights were turned off and many were sleeping. Bodies of her siblings were laying across hard beds, but she was sitting on the floor engulfed in darkness. 

Thoughts of guilt, isolation and regret swam across her mind and added to the darkness. Screams of her mind rang through her ears as she was taken back to the concert. Volts stung through her skin as she was taken back to the interrogation room. Heart break pained the air as she was taken back to Sissy driving into the distance.

A voice broke her thoughts, the voice that the light once took, “Vanya? Are you coming to bed?” If she went to bed then she would have to be trapped in a darkness for hours, but she knew that the darkness would not be present in her dreams as the light of her family was nearby.


End file.
